Unmasking Childhood Trauma, Brain Injuries and Rebuilding Life As You Know It - Kara Stoltenberg
“Trauma, unresolved, hijacks our intimate relationships.”
Today, our host Ed Coambs delves into this difficult topic with guest Kara Stoltenberg, an author, spiritual mentor, and life coach who shares her profound journey of resilience and healing. Listen in as Kara opens up about the significant life traumas she has faced, from health struggles to a life-threatening bike accident, and the challenges she encountered and continues to face as a single mother and the sole breadwinner of her family. She discusses her passion for helping her clients navigate their trauma and how it has shaped her professional path.
Kara and Ed explore the impact of trauma on intimate relationships and the importance of healing. She shares her insights on how trauma shapes our decisions, affects our relationships, and the vital process of guiding ourselves out of victimhood. They touch on the healing power of EMDR, a radical experience that helps unravel dissociated memories, and the importance of working on our 'pickers' during the healing process.
The discussion continues with an examination of the intersections of trauma, intimacy, and money. Ed and Kara talk about the dance of sharing trauma stories in relationships and the courage required to take risks in sharing. Kara's inspiring story of using a self-driving Tesla to manage driving after her brain injury and the associated shame around receiving support provides a valuable perspective on overcoming shame and embracing help. In wrapping up, they delve into the concept of financial intimacy and how taking time to reflect and journal can greatly assist in this journey. Tune in to this insightful episode for a deep understanding of trauma, healing, and financial intimacy.
Key Topics:
- Intro to Kara and her story (00:56)
- “It’s not healing, period” (11:12)
- Unresolved Trauma Hijacks our Relationships (16:48)
- Why Victim Mentality Brings Shame to Victims (22:36)
- Speaking About it is Part of Resolving Trauma (28:27)
- The Delicate Dance of Sharing Your Story (33:58)
- Kara’s Reaction to Fundraising After Her Accident (36:25)
- Ed’s Live Therapy Experiment (43:03)
- Circling Back to How Trauma Affects Intimacy (47:45)
Resources:
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